Branson Hipsters!

Branson shall soon be discovered and taken over by the hipsters!! Allow me to show my work...

The cultural landscape of Branson, though most deny the existence of culture in Branson, is so primed for the invasion of hipsters. I can say this, I am a hipster! QUE my wife's eye roll now. Don't let my clothing, attitude, and lack of a curly q mustache fool you, I am ALL hipster! But a lovable hipster! Hold on, This is my first stand up set, I've got to Instagram this... Trust me, I look like Marcus Mumford, watch Community and Dr. Who and I liked Kings of Leon 5 years before anyone knew who they were. So there are my credentials. My hipster resume if you will. But I digress...

As I was saying, as a hipster, I am fascinated by Branson! My wife makes fun of me for it, but I love it! Oh the ironic things you could do!! You could laugh ironically at Yakov's explanation of "what a country" America is (side note, with the craziness in Russia and the Ukraine, Yakov is about to be relevant again), you can cruise the strip on a moped and see all the flashing lights, but go early, the sun isn't down for that long in the summer before everything closes, and you can spend a day at Silver Dollar City! I'm so surprised this place isn't overran by hipsters already! You can be accepted for whatever type of facial hair you currently possess! This is a haven for those in the self-sustaining lifestyle! The make their own food and candy, they make things out of wood and iron, they make their own soap for crying out loud!  And the style and fashion? Walking around the park is like the Portlandia's music video for the dream of the 1890's is alive in Portland! Sorry Fred and Carrie, the dream on the 1890's is alive in Branson! And the gift shop of Silver Dollar City? That's like the Dream of The 90's! They should skip the middle man and just start selling their line in thrift shops around the country. Yes I want a T-shirt that says I have rode Thunderation and survived! Of course I want a Christmas sweatshirt that has permanent glitter on it! One of my favorite times to go is during their Bluegrass and BBQ festival! It's just like Telluride! The only thing missing is PBR! 

But in the end, what I fear will happen is that the hipsters will grow too comfortable. Novelty and irony will transform into reality, and they will never leave. They will buy timeshares, but not the commercialized lofts on the landing, those are for the yuppies, you might know them as posers, they will buy, or let's face it, build, well the lumberjack hipsters anyways, Bon Iver style cabins on Table Rock Lake, and retreat there for solitude. They will say, "wouldn't it be funny if I got a job at the ticket counter for The Duttons?" They will become addicted to going to all the shows, ironically at first, but then they will develop a taste for it. They will begin to identify with The Baldknobbers in theory. And slowly buy surely you can rest assured that the torch will be passed from one set of hipsters to the next (former based on the fact that a large majority of the population have had hip replacements).